Baseballhead:
The Loophole Series

Michael Cox

Welcome to the pre-LCS edition of Baseballhead, where we are really kicking ourselves for not getting that cable splitter box. In fact, it would've helped to have a few separate TVs on Saturday, as at one point there were three games being played simultaneously, plus NetAid (Note to Puffy: welcome to the world of musicians who have to play the same songs over and over until they're fifty).

Speaking of NetAid, I wonder if the embarrassingly low attendance at Giants Stadium was due to the both New York teams potentially clinching their series on the same day. If I were a Tri-State Area resident I probably would have opted for the music, based on the fact that Mets championships are on a more frequent cycle than day-long worldwide benefit concerts.

Speaking of scheduling, MLB gave us two NLCS-clinching games that almost finished at the exact same time, which was a shame. Without picture-in-picture, I had to balance the Astros' attempted comeback with the deadlocked Mets and D-Backs. Of course, any kids whose parents wanted them sharp for school missed the first two New York-Arizona games entirely because of MLB's insistence on the heretofore-unheard-of 8 pm PDT starts.

You wonder just how "necessary" the late starts really are when you remember that these same geniuses insisted that all Division Series games be played at the exact same time in 1995.

It was interesting that, at least in the Seattle area, both ESPNs suddenly lost signal in the ninth inning of their respective games, just as FOX was beginning their coverage of the Indians-Red Sox Game 3. Of course it's crazy to think it, but could Rupert Murdoch have been involved in...nahhhh. Fortunately, signal came back in time for both ESPN games to reach their exciting conclusions.

In fact, the NLDS games were in general as exciting as their AL counterparts were boring (until the Indians-Sox Game Five, that is). Extra innings, late-inning comebacks, pitching moves that made or lost games, it was all there. Too bad the clinching contests were on ESPN and (eck) ESPN-2. You had the utterly insufferable Ray Knight on the mama network, and not many viewers on its expanded-cable stepchild.

And whose idea was it to put Knight on the D-Backs-Mets series, for God's sake? Compounding his fingernails-on-chalkboard voice and utterly useless "color" were reminiscences of his '86 championship and raging Mets homerism.

Case in point: the very nanosecond Darryl Hamilton's drive down the line was called foul in the eighth inning of Game 4, Knight exclaims, "Oh, we gotta see the replay!" Then, when the replay showed that any reasonable human straddling the line would call it foul and Chris Berman said so, Our Ray piped up with "How do you know?! It's just gotta nick it!" Well, Ray, until they get electronic line judges like tennis, any ump seeing the ball land there does know.

I found something Ray didn't question much more interesting: With a tie game, the bases loaded with two outs in the eighth and the champagne chilling in the clubhouse, do you pinch-hit for Gold Glove Award-Winning Shortstop Rey Ordonez?

You'd better. In fact, I'd say it's just as easy a decision as pinch-hitting for your pitcher, but Bobby Valentine must have been more concerned about his role as third base coach.

Speaking of the Cookie Rojas ejection, don't you think a guy who's been in baseball as long as him would know better than to shove an umpire so blatantly, especially when the umpire was right?

Finally, as for that Game Five in Cleveland, do you think FOX' Tim "Legally Insane" McCarver would still be calling Jimy Williams "brilliant" if the Tribe's pitching had held out and Pedro Martinez had ended up not giving up a single run but losing the game?

Now it's on to the Championship Series. Let's predict away:

- Braves vs. Mets. Frankly, this should have been one of the Division Series matchups (even the name of that series is a misnomer when two teams from the same division cannot meet in it). Same division or not, the team with the best record should play that with the worst.

The Mets, like the Marlins in 1997, took advantage of this loophole to get a much more beatable opponent in the Division Series. Also like those Marlins, the Mets appear to have some "Big Mo" going into the NLCS. Do I think this matters a whit against the 1999 Braves?

Nope.

- Yankees vs. Red Sox. Geez, I just wrote all that stuff up there and now I have to paraphrase it again here. Red Sox get lesser opponent due to loophole, Red Sox beat lesser opponent (yes, it was me who called the Tribe's pitching "implosive"), Red Sox go to ALCS. Yanks win, Yanks win. Just be thankful there won't be a "subway series."

So, for the first time in the history of divisional play, the Championship Series round is simply a series to decide both division winners. If the Braves or Yanks lose, they don't deserve to be East Division champs and should refund the fans for all the merchandise bearing said title.

And if both lose, I hope Mike Stanley is up to the historical pressure.

about the author

Michael Cox just came to the realization that the elimination of every team he wouldn't mind seeing win a World Series just means there's more time for eating pie. Send recipes quick at mc@strikethree.com.