Beerhead:
The Week that Walked

Derek Zumsteg

Welcome to Beerhead, the replacement column for Baseballhead while Michael's on vacation. It's been a boring week, but I'll be spicing things by attacking Yankee players.

Item: In standard media fashion, Seattle media is already begining to call en masse for Alex Rodriguez to be traded for relief pitching, starting pitching -- any kind of pitching. Apparantly unaware that previous trades for pitching -- any kind of pitching -- have all been disasters when the players arrive in Seattle. This is the kind of annoying media pack mentality that breeds contempt. It seems like they all turn at once -- attack Mo Vaughn, lament his loss, reveal he was a loser while in Boston, etc. Do they all sit in on a conference call and decide what the position of the week is?

Insult: Scott "Atrocious" Brosius is showing his career form this season, with an on-base percentage that makes Rey Ordonez look good. Good thing they got rid of Mike Lowell so I can mock them daily.

Item: There are now two buyers for the Oakland A's, a franchise with some young life and a decent future (as opposed to, say, the Mariners), both willing to cough up $122m for a franchise in a poor stadium (I'm sorry, I really am, but it's the truth). Bizarrely, Corruptioner Selig has publicly said he prefers the bid by the guys who want more revenue, and don't seem particulalry interested in keeping the team in the Bay, over the city-endorsed Joe Morgan - Andy Dolich bid, which seems commited to keeping the team in town.

Why? Because if you were a group of super-rich monopolists, driven mad by power, operating in secrecy, who would you rather have buy the team -- like-minded businessmen or locally-supported philathropists? This is why baseball tolerates Reisdorf and refuses to let the 75-person Royals group save that team. It's pathetic.

Insult: Speaking of pathetic, is there anything more pitiable that another roster spot for Tony Fossas? How can the best team in baseball hire a dead-armed lefty with a history of pitching terribly for years now? He and Brosius should swap positions -- it'd likely be an improvement for both of them.

Item: Greg Maddux continues to get whupped. Despite his 4-2 record, I can't remember a time when I've seen him get hit so hard, so frequently. We saw he was mortal late last season, but it was tough to believe. I know that he's been untouchable for so long it couldn't last forever, but I hope this isn't the start of a career tailspin.

Insult: It must suck when you trade some prospects for a pitcher, negotiate a contract extension in a backroom, and then he injures himself after winning 2 games in 5 appearances, barely escaping losses only through luck and run support. Serves the Yankees right, the sleazy cheaters. If Guliani really wanted to clean out the sleaze in NY, he'd start in the Yankee front office.

Item: Nike's commercials do more for baseball each season than baseball's cumulative public relations efforts. These long ball commercials are really cool (and, in a couple of cases, really funny). It really puts baseball to shame, though, for not putting enough into promoting their game -- at all. Baseball ranks dead last in terms of self-promotion of any major sport including hockey. I'm not interested in seeing baseball turned into the video games like the NBA, but come on -- can't they put out bids for ad agencies and do something?

Insult: Chad Curtis sure is tearing it up this year. What, was Daryl unavailable this year?

about the author

We were going to protect Derek Zumsteg from the looming email bombfest, but he drank the last Pyramid Hefeweizen at our last staff meeting.