He Won't Make House Calls:
The Most Annoying Thing  About Being a Modern Mariner Fan

While carpooling to work last spring, my co-worker Alex remarked that it must be nice for me to be a Mariner fan. Remembering that Alex had only emigrated from Russia in 1988 helped me to regain control of my car. He has been aware of baseball only as long as Ken Griffey, Jr. and Randy Johnson have been with the Mariners. He knows the Mariners who won two of the last three Western Division Championships. He doesn't remember Steve Trout or Rey Quinones (did he really refuse to pinch hit because he was on the last level of Super Mario Brothers in the clubhouse, or was that just a legend?). During those years when I went to games with 7,000 of my close, personal friends, a Mariner win was merely an unexpected reward for listening to Dave Neihaus. I cannot even remember a time when the prospect of an AL West title for the Mariners crossed my mind.

And all M's fans knew why: George Argyros. Every time a player developed into a star, off the player went to a contender. Throughout my first year as a baseball fan, my father complained about losing Tom Paciorek the previous season. Even when they weren't traded, quality players escaped to real major league teams as soon as possible. There was no need to make these players feel welcomed or to make them feel part of a team - they weren't going to be around long enough to make a difference.

My parents' generation remembers where they were when they heard that Kennedy had been shot. I remember where I was when I heard that George Argyros would sell the team, because that moment gave me hope that I might someday hear Dave Neihaus' hoarse voice screaming, "and the Mariners are going to play for the American League Championship! I don't believe it! It just continues! My oh my!"

Although it took a second new ownership group and Griffey threatening to leave, at least the Mariners have kept a quality team together.

They are not, however, a better organization. It seems as though Woody Woodward still operates under the assumption that no rational human being could ever want to play in Seattle. This assumption was true in 1988.  It is false in 1998.

Remember Mike Jackson? During the 1996-97 off-season, he said that his agent had contacted the Mariners a dozen times and didn't even receive a return call. "I thought I meant a lot more to their bullpen than what they showed this winter," Jax puzzled. "I expected them to at least return my calls. I pitched my rear off for them all year long, and you slap me in the face? I didn't think that was right, but that's baseball. I can live with it...All I wanted was a phone call to tell me why." Jackson assured the media that he carried no hard feelings, but believed that the Mariners would miss his work more than they realize. How prophetic.

"That's baseball. I can live with it."

It shouldn't be. He shouldn't have to.

True, baseball is a business. However, such a simplistic statement ignores the point of the baseball business. For example, the point of the car business is to make a profit by manufacturing vehicles that move from one point to another - sometimes safely and sometimes quickly. The point of the baseball business is to make a profit by entertaining fans and giving little kids heroes.

When a player plays well, reward him with money. When a player plays hard, when a player makes an organization look good in the community, reward him with thanks, a returned phone call, or anything else that might constitute respect. No general manager is so busy that he cannot return one phone call to a player sometime during the off-season. I cannot see how telling Mike Jackson that the Mariners did not have the money to re-sign him could possibly have hurt his feelings more than a dial tone. The Mariner front office burned a bridge with Mike Jackson. They are doing the same with Randy Johnson. He may actually like winning, he may actually like Seattle, and he may trade money for life-style. No one will know unless they try.  If nothing else, it will make R.J. feel wanted.

Alex was right, the Mariners are a winning organization.  They should start behaving like one.

Benjamin Gregory Ramm is a Mariner fan living in the Bay Area, where he runs an off-track betting parlor for the Oakland Coliseum dot races. Put five bucks on the red at bgr@strikethree.com.

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