Baseballhead:
Support Your Local Pennant Race

Michael Cox

Light up the Baseballhead and pass it to the left-hand side! This week we had the opportunity to view FOX Sports Net's The Best Damn Sports Show Ever, and realized two things: 1) It's a bad idea to name a show using the tagline of a far, far better show (i.e., The Daily Show); and 2) Any show containing Tom Arnold had better be using the titular word "Best" only to add a touch of irony. However, we do appreciate the subtle talents of John Kruk, and hope that he one day finds himself in a vehicle worthy of his talent, like Let's Bowl!

Moving into the last week of regular-season baseball, we have us a regular Tale of Two Leagues. The AL races were all tidied up when the Red Sox and Twins limped away, leaving the Mariners, A's, Yankees and Indians over a full week to play their B-squads and confuse opposing scouts by making their sluggers bunt.

Over in Senior Circuit Land, however, the divisional races have all tightened to the point where no one leads by more than two games. In fact, the only thing that's virtually certain is that both the Astros and Cards will be heading to the big dance.

Of the teams we oohed and ahhed over in the first half, only two remain: The record-breaking Mariners, and the we're-still-not-sure-how-they're-doing-it Phillies. Meanwhile, the Cubs have faded, the Brewers have plummeted like the Hindenburg, and those Amazin' Twins have not yet clinched a winning record.

But let us focus on that which is not yet to be, namely: NL divisional races and records, records, records!

Doesn't Anybody Want to Win Out There: I swear, when I went to bed last night the Astros had the Central all but won, the sluggish Giants were assuring another Diamondback postseason appearance, and the Braves had finally got their groove back. Not so, I guess, as now it's unlikely anyone will clinch prior to the weekend. So why would anyone want to watch an AL game this week?

The 'Stros in particular had appeared to be on cruise control, but they didn't so much lose their lead over the Redbirds as St.Louis obliterated it. The Cards lost only five games in the month of September, a feat bettered only by the Best Team in Baseball (tm), the Oakland A's. And like the AL West, the NL Central now contains the two best teams in the league, so the only question is whether St. Louis or Houston will have home-field advantage in the playoffs.

Arizona, however, saw their lead slip away the old-fashioned way: they lost it. Since August 21 the D-Backs have played mere .500 ball -- the only surprise is that they kept their hold on the NL West. Consider it Christmas in September for the Giants, who by rights should have only Barry Bonds' home run chase to look forward to, but instead went a massive 16-14 over the past six weeks to pull within a series win of the Phoenicians. We'll get to Barry in a minute, so just hold yer horses.

In the East, the Braves actually managed to scrape together a winning September -- but just barely. The Phils got back in the race by winning three of the four head-to-head games with Atlanta after baseball returned from its involuntary break. Since then neither team has put together a winning streak of note, assuring that this week it'll all come down to who tries hardest to not lose.

What about the Mets, you say? Even after putting together a Cards-like September they're only four games over .500. The fact that they're four games back doesn't make them a good team, it makes the East division the Shame Of The NL. In the old divisional structure, all three of these teams would be reserving tee times by now as the Cards finish stomping them flat.

In short, all three divisions are going down to the wire, and we'll see head-to-head series between the Braves and Phils (beginning tomorrow in Atlanta) and the Astros and Cards (this weekend at Busch Stadium) that may well decide their divisions. Personally, I'm rooting for the Phillies to overtake Atlanta in the East, for the simple reason that it would be nice for someone different to get to the postseason.

The Homer of the Free: You can't swing a dead cat right now without hitting a sportswriter making all kinds of apologies for not getting excited about Barry Bonds' now-certain trek to the single-season home run crown.

"Mac took us along for the ride," they grouse, selectively forgetting the double-sided sheet of rules the press had to follow in 1998. "Barry doesn't want to talk, so what is there to write about," they ask, forgetting that last time around the questions were so crappy and repetitive that in lieu of new quotes they instead ran features on how much McGwire loves Starbucks coffee.

The au courant excuse du jour is "but it's only been three years since it was done last!" Now, there they might have something, even if it's a reason every bit as lame as the others.

Before '98, the magic 61 was an awesome milestone. Players who hit 50 were revered as gods. Virgins were sacrificed to the altar of Albert Belle by statheads everywhere (leaving very few statheads to repopulate the Earth once they learned to breed), while the more personality-inclined stood in awe of Ken Griffey Jr.'s I-didn't-even-try-to-hit-it-all-that-hard swing.

When McGwire hit the 50 mark earlier in the season than ever before, people stood and took notice, still not really believing the record could be broken. When Smilin' Sammy joined in the chase, it became possible, but still not probable. When the record finally fell, America collectively said, "Holy crap!" We then watched in utter disbelief as nine more homers were appended to the number in the record book.

This season, however, we've seen it all before. For all we know, the record will be broken and re-broken every year. The sluggers nowadays are all brawny and stuff. They take those WWF steroids and use the Juice Tiger and work out with 50-pound sacks of potatoes strapped across their shoulders. These are not humans, they're a race of supermen capable of telekinesis.

Don't believe it. Especially this year.

Barry Bonds is not Mark McGwire. Bonds is an all-around hitter who will break the record in part because he sees the ball so well, and who is hitting these home runs in a pennant race situation. In '98, pitchers were specifically instructed to "go after" Mac (you can look up the managerial quotes), whether they were grizzled veterans or weak-kneed rookies. This year they're staying away from Bonds in record numbers -- he's also on pace to break Babe Ruth's single-season walks record, giving him about 10% more free passes than the 1998 homer kings.

I will admit that the surprise factor is gone, erased for the near future by the events of 1998. However, that isn't Barry Bonds' fault. When you get jaded, that's your problem, not the world's. While we may not be as excited by this record-breaking season, it makes Barry's achievement no less historic than McGwire's or Maris' or Ruth's. FOX may not be planning to make tomorrow's game a prime-time event like the Cards-Cubs game in which Mac hit number 62, but that's FOX's issue, and any network who presents Who Wants to be a Princess -- twice -- deserves their karmic reward.

Don't even get me started on how big it is that Rickey Henderson will break Ty Cobb's career runs record, yet reporters everywhere are treating the event as if they simply misheard and think Rickey has "the runs."

about the author

Michael Cox has just set the single-season Barry Bonds-defense record. See to it that he's presented with the Almighty Commissioner's Prestigious High Honor (or whatever it's called) at mc@strikethree.com.