Baseballhead:
At the Quarter Pole

Michael Cox

Tonight, on a very special Baseballhead, it's the one-hour season finale, during which we get married, have a baby, complete our five-year mission, and return to our home planet...what? Oh yeah -- our season doesn't end for six more months. Never mind.

Wellll, if in February I had been in a bar somewhere and said loudly that the Twins and Phillies not only would be leading their divisions in late May, but also would have the second-best records in their respective leagues, I'd have been cut off and my car keys confiscated. But that, my friends, is exactly where we stand with one-quarter of the season over.

And no one could have predicted that any team, much less the Mariners, would have had the historic first 40 games that Seattle has witnessed this spring. Only the '84 Tigers did better, and we know where they ended up (besides "in Detroit," wise guy). Texas, on the other hand, is almost ready to call it a season, putting out feelers to see who'll give up young pitchers in return for 18 months or less of Ivan "That Other Rodriguez" Rodriguez.

Rather than predict whether the Genetic Duplicates can ride their start to a playoff berth (maybe, but not with a division title) or whether the Rangers can turn it around (don't make me laff), let's look at what has gone as expected:

Unbalanced Schedules make strange things happen. A lot of the strange things you've been watching are due to the new, extremely unbalanced schedules. For those who don't know, "unbalanced" means Bud Selig apparently has a screw loose, believing that one team in the AL West can play the Devil Rays nine times and the Yankees seven, while their divisional rivals play the Yanks nine times and the Rays seven. This is all because Selig believes more people will flood ballparks if each team gets to play an extra home series against its closest rivals.

What has happened is that a few teams have been able to prey on crappy divisional rivals. It's no surprise that two of the three best records in MLB are in the virtually quadraplegic Central divisions.

The A's are running hot and cold. Young teams do this, sometimes to the extreme. Falling 13 games behind the leaders is never good for post-season prospects, but The Best Team in Baseball (tm) appears to be righting their vessel and conjuring the Spirit of '00 once again after flailing helplessly for most of April. If you're an Athletic supporter, you can at least be glad they didn't do that last September.

The Cubs are falling! The Cubs are falling! Hands up, everyone who thought their first-place reign was anything more than a passing phase. Okay, you can put your hand down, Mr. Baylor. Now descending towards .500 and points south, the Cards and Astros are resuming their regularly-scheduled division battle.

The NL West is the tightest race in baseball. Four of the five teams in this division have the capability to win the title this year. Even the team that doesn't (do I need to mention the Padres by name?) has hung in so far. Everyone's .500 or over. The Dodgers haven't even beaten up innocent fans yet. Somebody has been working on the feng shui in this division.

Mark McGwire is hurt. Go figure.

The Tribe is running a close second. No one expected it to be behind the Twins, but Cleveland's recent surge has put them in perfect position to take over once Minnesota swoons. Oh, and they will swoon...

Texas' pitching bites. Bites big time. This may be A-Rod's personal hell: waking up year after year and finding himself on the 1998 Mariners. The '27 Yankee lineup couldn't overcome an average Rick "Rhymes with 'Shelling'" Helling outing.

Tony Gwynn is hurt. Go figure.

Houston has figured out their problem. They're still having a bit of an issue with Enron Field, with only a 7-7 record there, but the 'Stros aren't letting that bother them on the road. Last year was really a lot of monumental bad luck, and it was probably due to Jeff Bagwell's facial grooming issues. Now if Bagwell could possibly loan his new barber to Jim Rome (you want "brutal honesty," Jim? You apparently hire Jerry Lewis to trim your goatee.)

The Devil Rays are really bad. Mind you, we figured at least their paychecks would clear, which apparently may not be the case for much longer.

Frank Robinson is handing out suspensions like candy on Easter. Again he has suspended a player for throwing near, but not hitting, a batter, while leaving other, batter-plunking pitchers unsuspended. I really feel Mr. Robinson has some deep-seated issues with pitchers, possibly dating back to his days as a player. I understand that therapist guy on "Oprah" can work wonders. Just a suggestion.

Will Clark is hurt. Oops, -- he actually retired. I knew I hadn't seen him playing for a reason...

Bobby Valentine's job is in serious jeopardy. Only this time it's not due to some fake quotes the media transcribed from a bulletin board posting, but because his team is actually down the hamper.

Pedro Martinez is that damn good. If you live in a city where he will be pitching, go see him. Pay any price you have to. Why? You will be able to tell your grandchildren you saw Pedro Martinez, and they will lknow who you are talking about.

So is Manny Ramirez. With a 1.238 OPS, he's earning every penny of his salary. We'll have to see what it will take for him to finally win an MVP. Todd Helton, Larry Walker (makes one wonder what Manny would be hitting if he was in Denver), and Barry Bonds aren't that far behind.

Ichiro is good, but not that good. The man has an eye that we may not have seen since Ted Williams -- and that may be precisely his problem. I'll go into this at length next week.

Cal Ripken should really consider retiring gracefully. With a .553 OPS so far, the prudent thing to do would be to accept the gold watch, and do it before he ends up starting in another All-Star Game. It would be a classy end to a classy career. Plus, we can't miss him if he won't go away.

Darryl Strawberry isn't going to jail. I can't decide whose drug escapades I'd rather not hear more of: Darryl's or Robert Downey Jr.'s. At least the cops occasionally find a Wonder Woman costume in Downey's closet to keep it interesting.

Somebody's on pace to hit 80 homers. That somebody is Luis Gonzalez. There are Vegas bookmakers who would love to take your wager.

about the author

Michael Cox wants you to know he had nothing to do with coding MLB's web site. Don't take it out on him. Apologize and offer PHP tips at mc@strikethree.com.