Baseballhead:
It's Time

Michael Cox

Welcome to Baseballhead, brought to you this week by the people who had the bright idea to "super-size" Friends.

This week, baseball begins anew. The boys of summer will gather, begin to shake off the rust from a winter of golf, and prepare for a season that the Brewers have already declared over. Young prospects will be eyeballed by wily managers, practical jokes will be played on rookies (possibly involving fire), and Rey Ordonez will tell the gathered media that he has been working on his hitting.

Sports-talk radio stations will send Eric Cartman to get interviews. Hotel rooms will fill up in Arizona and Florida, as ballparks will be filled with elderly people in way too little clothing.

Maybe I should stop there.

The point is that it's time to forget what has been possibly the most stupefyingly dull offseason in baseball history (in itself a testament to the marketing acumen of MLB, Inc.) and remind ourselves that in February of1998 we had no idea that Roger Maris' record would be broken by not one, but two players. In February of 2000 there was no inkling that the West would be the most powerful division in the AL. And in February 1995, well...we didn't think there would be baseball at all (hey -- get set for 2002!).

It's Spring Training. A clean slate. A time when the Royals and Pirates can contend, and when Steinbrenner can sound like he wants to fire the whole team. When Bret Boone and Todd Hollandsworth might actually finally live up to their years of hype. When Japan will suffer from a sports reporter shortage while they're over here covering Ichiro Suzuki.

It's a reminder of, to adapt the line, all that's good about baseball, and what can be again. Pastoral, minus the between-innings hype. Green, with places to spread out a picnic lunch as you watch the game. Beers only $3. Hot dogs only $2. 'Scuse me while I book my flight...

Anyway, beginning next week this column will devote much of its time to predicting the outcome of the 2001 season. Keep in mind that, to butcher another phrase, there's many a slip 'twixt the cup and the lip, and trades, injuries or just plain out-of-character play can change things a great deal. Still, we're quite happy with our track record (let's put it this way: the people who yelled at me last spring for picking the Phillies and Pirates last haven't written back to say "I told you so").

But here and now I'd like to invite you to send in your picks for the season to come. Who'll win? Who'll lose? Who'll end up in jail? Which member of his own team will Steinbrenner insult first? Write 'em down and send 'em in, and I'll share them with our viewing audience.

Who knows? You may do better than the Strikethree.com gang! If you do, we'll think about maybe giving you a prize (I'm positive we've got a t-shirt kicking around the storage room)! But don't do it for the reward -- do it for the same reason Alex Rodriguez does it: for the love of the game!

And if you're going to Spring training, first to pie Bud Selig definitely gets a shirt (but we will not pay your bail or any hospital bills you may incur after Chad Kreuter defends him).

about the author

Michael Cox thinks the Phils and Bucs will improve substantially in 2001, if only in the Speed of Eating Post-Game Meals category. Assess their chances of gaining proficiency at sunflower-seed spitting at mc@strikethree.com.

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